The Worst Circus Act in Town

 

                                "We are the greatest show on earth" P.T. Barnum about his beloved circus

Donald J. Trump has also said so in so many words about our country, and charlatan that he is, half the country believes him. Yet these same people truly believe the country is in awful shape, blaming the "criminal" and "mentally-ill" illegal immigrants, yearnong for a disrupter once more, and blaming the rising cost of groceries on the former adminstration. New Yorkers who grew up with the real estate scams of Donald and his father, Fred, and also those who lived through the unfair prosecution of the Central Park Five and the full-page ad he took out in the NYT placing the blame on the accused  youngsters, knew him as a bullshitter, a liar and a tax-fraud schemer. What is worse than an incorrigible liar is the people who believe him. America is currently the laughing stock of the world!

Now that five days have passed  since the inaguration and the price of eggs has nearly DOUBLED,  I am trying to figure out what is the worst of his acts, since daily there is an assault on all the norms of law and decency. Five days in and Pete Hegseth, poorly behaved alcoholic and abuser of women (indeed, he admitted to Elizabeth Warren he paid off one of the many women $50,000 to keep quiet) is now the head of the military, and he deserves ZERO respect because he has ZERO experience. Congresswoman Mikie Sherrill, who served in the military, said five star generals and military personnel will never listen to his orders, since he has no idea whatsoever how the military operates. What is worse? Only three senators voted no on his confirmation, since the senate is a House of Scam, with sentate Republicans bowing to the king, terrified of reaping the wrath of The Donald (what NewYorkers called him years ago). 

That was yesterday. In the days prior, he announced his mass deportation, which has started in sanctuary cities. The BIG LIE is no one targeted is a criminal, many have applied for legal asylum, and he is now sending ICE agents in to businesses, schools and Churches without a warrant, which is totally ILLEGAL. Indeed, laws do not matter in this new adminstration. Nor does experience matter; most people slated to head big and important divisions have conspiracy-theory ideas; don't believe in free and fair elections (aside from now, of course, since Trump won) and are slated to destroy the very fabric of our society simply by following this mean, elected president, who lacks morality, decency and character. He has pulled us out of the WHO, which means the health and safety of our fellow Americans has no checks or balances; he has pullled us out of the Paris Climate Accord (forget climate change,  a left-wing hoax), fired people who dare to defy his politics; the $35.00 for insulun cap, now gone; he disparaged Bishop Budde, who dared to suggest he "take mercy on humanity. People are scared, vulnerable and we need to have compassion and humanity." Humanity from Donald Trump is out of the question, but what is reprehensible is not one of his minions dared to stand up for her or the decency she provided during this time of indecency. They can't. He even suggested she is stupid (his go-to) and she should apologize to him. 

No, HE SHOULD APOLOGIZE to the American people for this daily assalt on Democracy! The absolute worst offense is the pardoning of all the insurrectionists, who he has audacity to call patriots.  Worse yet, he called them hostages. Seriously! He has let these criminals out of prison, those who attacked and killed police officers; who stormed the capital with bats, broke in by smashing windows; defecated on the floors; terrorized people in the house and senate, who had to go into hiding; chanted "Hang Mike Pence;"  and all these people are now out, poised and ready for retaliation and retribution, getting ready with their guns. He has even called for the Oath Keepers and Proud Boys to have a place in our government, and these Domestic terrorist groups are absolutely thrilled to have a president as lawless as they are. They are ready for their guns, yet again, and set to engage in another insurrection. I suppose they can ask Trump to join them, which he would gladly do. He is that mentally unhinged.

These insurrectionists are the new S.S.,  taking orders from a dictator, and this is just the beginning. When Hitler took power, he capitalized on base fears and the worst human impulses, painting a picture of the other, diminshing the rule of law, which enabled him to embark upon genocide. So, too, is Trump ready for the metaphoric kill--that of character, and the legitimacy of what was once a Democratic country. Undeniably, this is the worst circus act in the world, and sitting it out on the sidelines is not really an option.

Hitler's Willing Executioners by Daniel Goldhagen

 In his brilliant account of World War 11, we come to understand the horror of the Holocaust. It becomes evident how easy it was for the Holocaust to occur, since anti-semitism was deeply embedded in society. There was, as Hannah Arendt says, "a banality of evil", but there was also widespread belief that death and destruction were acceptable, since those people and norms being killed were worthy of being destroyed. Jews were, after all, so demonized, and so their destruction was necessary. Ordinary citizens came to this vision of reality, so it was easy for them to participate--or else look the other way.

The new adminstration under the tutelage of a crazy man is not engaged in a horror of this magnitude, but as I wake up after the day of the inaguration,  I have come to see how easy it is to get people to bend to the will of a dictator. Tim Snyder, a noted historian and political writer, has compared Trump to Hitler, in a  comparison that truly resonates the day after, though I would take a leap and say not Hitler, but a dictator, hell-bent on eradication of a certain population of humanity, and also all our norms of decency and a legitimate government.

Let's just start with day one. He has pardoned at least a thousand insurrectionists, who came to a sacred U.S. institution with guns and bats, broke into the White House by shattering its glass windows, defecated on the floors, killed police officers, harmed people along the way, destroyed offices (Nancy Pelosi's, among them) and shouted "Kill Mike Pence," the vice president, who surely would have been dead if not for going into hiding. Yet, Pence came to the Inaguration and shook his hand. Why?  Trump wanted Pence dead, because he was willing to follow the Constitution, a historical document which will surely be defunct by the end of 2029. Additionally, Trump has called the Oath Keepers and Proud Boys, domestic terrorist organizations, a group of good people, Patriots, in fact, I suppose in the league of the S.S.

Day one has also included pulling us out of the Paris Climate Accords, an anchor to Climate Change, the natural diaster that has already wreaked havoc in states across the country, as well as WHO, the World Health Organization. Today, day two, he is poised to deport thousands of immigrants, which means not just the criminals and drug dealers, but decent people trying to seek legal asylum for their families beset by the poverty and terror in their own countries. Trump and his minions have already deomized them, even as so many are decent, hard-working, even tax-paying citizens, just waiting for the long process of seeking legal asylum in this country, as many of your families once did.

Yet, he has a party that accepts all of this, his eradication, his vitriol, his isolationism and incorrigible acts, his inhumanity to the poor, the suffering, humanity in general. They are the "Willing Executioners," a party that not only does nothing but justifies (some of whom call themselves "Good Christians") everything he does, no matter the level of insanity. They do not question the dictator, nor does his base, who cheer every despicable word that comes out of his mouth, every act. Yes, I blame some of the voters who heard what he said, and yet, everything was acceptable. Dictators can only be dictators because no one stops them, and so many have not or will not, ever.

Shame on this world that looks the other way--or better yet, participates. Hitler, too, was once a hero, and look what happened to a precious population, the world. I don't just blame the leader, I blame the multitude of sheep that follow him. 

"This is the way the world ends/not with a bang but a whimper." T.S. Eliot

Frozen Hearts and Feckless Leaders

 Today is the inaguration of  Donald J. Trump. It is also Martin Luther King Day. The irony is not lost here. You couldn't find two men more diametrically opposed. King was a man of honor, dignity and respect who marched peacefully for the rights of freedom and human rights. He was a great and powerful orator, whose messages were always on point: the equality of humankind. Trump deserves little to no respect because of his oration, whose focus has consistently been on hate and denigration. He repeatedly lies, so it is nearly impossible to figure out what he stands for, aside from me, myself and I. He is vain, petty and worse still, a heartless man who proudly stands on his charlatan pulpit announcing he is poised to deport millions of immigrants today or tomorrow, the first days of his presidency. He boasts of family separations--and his feckless crowd and impotent party cheer him on, as if any of this is acceptable.

I will not watch this charade, so the television is off today, on this tundra of a day with arctic air spinning around. It is a terrific metaphor for what is inside his heart: Nothing. Guess who comes inside for the inaguration? All his techie millionaire friends who have converted to his calls to eliminate fact-checking, thereby becoming a real platform to perpetuate his lies. Where are the hearts and souls of these people? I would say absent. The goal is money and power, not the good values of morality, decency and integrity. Donald J. Trump is the Snow King, frozen in a huge land of ice. 

The chill comes not just from him, but from the lack of courage of practically everyone he surrounds himself with, since he only surrounds himself with loyalists willing to enact his retribution. Most of his cabinet choices support the pardoning of the insurrectionists of January 6th, and believe he was the legitimate president in 2020, since this is what he has told them.  Partriotism is defined as support for the incorrigible king. Morality is out the door.

What makes this tenure so incredibly ugly are his policies--or lack up--since he is hell-bent on destruction of all the norms and checks and balances we have, instead focusing on hurting people, in particular those he has said he would help. Since there is a whirlwind of destruction, I select just one act of indecency. One of his henchman, Mike Johnson, hypocrite exraordinaire, has told Gavin Newsome, the governor of California, the government will not help the state, which recently suffered billions of dollars in the loss of homes, schools, houses of worship, infrastructure, all because of wildfires. One of the causes of these fires has to do with climate change, which the party has decided is a non-issue.Oh, they will give funding only IF California agrees to their list of demands. More importantly, what kind of feckless leaders tell a suffering state and its inhabitants, I will only give you money if you do as I say, follow my rules? This is not the way government is supposed to work. Biden did the opposite with North Carolina's recent flooding. Helping the people of North Carolina did not come attached to a quid pro quo.

But with a frozen heart and feckless, spineless leaders, get ready for a transactional and mean-spirited government, an autocracy, where first they come after the most vulnerable--and then they come for you. Even those of you who voted for him.

The Apocalypse

 A convicted felon will be inaugurated into office in less than ten days. Though there is discussion of giving him a chance, that train has passed long ago. Since 2016, his lies have grown exponentially to the point that I can't look at him with anything but disdain--nor can I keep on circulating this consistent level of wrath, since I feel like the spoon ladling the pot, without ever cooking a meal. I will continue to oppose what he calls a government.  Although the supreme court in their five four decision did not intervene on his behalf in his sentencing in the NY case, it is hard to fathom how 4 of the justices are ALWAYS on his side. He is above the law; that is what justice appears to be from some jurists from the supreme court. This is an uphill battle.

Meanwhile, L.A. is literally burning; eleven now dead, at least ten thousand people have been displaced or have lost their homes, and this part of California looks like a war zone. What does this wreck of humanity do? He blames the governor of California for what are the winds of California. NOT ONCE does he offer an iota of compassion to the fires ravaging  the state--the children who have lost their homes, their schools, their pets, their places of worship. What breed of human being does this? G-d help the state and the people when he is in office. Owned by MUSK and the billionaires, his interest is NOT in saving lives, but in saving dollars and cents, at the expense of people who are already suffering. Actually, the money is only intended to go in HIS pockets. And now all his tech cronies are willing to perpetuate disinformation. This is truly a world on fire, a world gone awry!

And while we are on the subject of suffering, if the economy was the issues that voted him in with a very slim margin, why is he not talking about it? Instead all I hear about is his desire to purchase Greenland, The Panama Canal, Canada and now he wants to rename The Gulf of Mexico the Gulf of America. The Mexican president already slammed him in a disparaging comment. She laughed at him for the clown he is, as are so many foreign leaders who snicker behind (and in front of his back) like the bad joke that is not going away.

Let's not forget his complaints about the flags that will be flying at half-mast because of former president Jimmy Carter's death. He couldn't hold a candle of decency or integrity to Carter. I suppose there is no heart to hold. A lying felon and adjudicated sexual abuser is going to swear an oath on the Bible and you wonder why the world is laughing at us?

But this is no laughing matter, since less than half the country wanted this (he received 49.9% of the vote). This is the apocalypse. This is a world on fire for a man who cares nothing, nothing, nothing about the folks who voted him in. This is the ugly AMERICAN, the man who would be king, yours--not mine!

Revenge and Retribution

 

                                    "Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall

                                    Humpty Dumpty had a great fall

                                    All the King's horses and all the king's men

                                    Couldn't put Humpty back together again."

So begins the Trump presidency, poised for disaster in 2025. When a man who dreams of being king sets his primary goal on ridding the country of all of his enemies, he--like Humpty Dumpty--is setting the country on a collision course that is terrifying and doomed to fail. He has an enemy list that includes several media outlets he abhors, and the likes of Joe Biden, Kamala Harris, Hillary Clinton, among others, and he has appointed unqualified people to his cabinet who will do his bidding. After all, it is alot easier to destroy an institution than to build one.

Let's start with Kash Patel, who in his 2023 book GOVERNMENT GANSTERS is going to head the F.B.I. and "has named 60 people as members of the executive branch deep state"-- "a cabal of unelected tyrants who posed the most dangerous threats to our democracy." He wants these political, military and media people to be dealt with "criminally or civilly." (NYT, Sarah Isgur, 12/14/2024). There are many people on this list, such as Bill Barr, who served as one of Donald Trump's attorney generals; John Bolton, who served as national security advisor; and Pat Cipollone, Mr.Trump's White House counsel." If you have spoken any word against the incoming king; if you are perceived as the opposition, you are part of the "deep state" and, according to Trump and his henchman (the future Federal Bureau of Insanity), you deserve jail time, at the very least, or the death penalty for Retired General Mark A. Milley. This is an absurd travesty of justice. Trump repeatedly said during his campaign, "Revenge and Retribution" and as professional journalists and politicians said, "Believe him!"

This insane premise would be fine if there were other guardrails, a criminal justice system that would safeguard folks against baseless prosecutions, but those are quickly disappearing. Once the Supreme Court granted Donald Trump, a clear-cut criminal, immunity under acts he committed when he was president, all gloves were off. We already know the Supreme Court, with its six Conservative justices, has given Trump a get out of jail free card, so what hope can there be for them to protect the innocent people who dare to question his authority. Plus, he has a whole cabinet of equally unqualified people, including Pam Bondi to head the justice department, who, aside from denying the results of the 2020 election, wants all "woke radical leftists" fired from the DOJ. This  spells the end of freedom for a democratic voice.

Let's not forget freedom of speech - they want NPR to end as well as newspapers who speak the truth to Trump's numerous lies. Just today Trump annnounced "I am not sure if grocery prices could be lowered for a very long time," a baseless campaign promise which people who saw through his charade knew was a bogus claim. That is what he does. But right now, as he begins policies to help claim  his demagoguery, who could possibly stop him?

Finally, there is Kari Lake chosen to serve as director of the federally funded boadcaster Voice of America, where America's achievements are boadcast worldwide. "Mr.Trump's thoughts of the media are clear: he calls reporters enemies of the people, derides critical news coverage of him as fake and muses about stripping broadcasters of their licenses" (NYT, Kate Rogers, 12/14). Ms. Lake, a former television anchor who lost her own elections, has often disparaged the press. Journalists are already reeling regarding the possibility of voicing free and independent coverage. This fear is justified. A man who bullies senators to support his appointees by intimidating them with fears of not being reelected will surely attempt to squelch all opposition, and he will likely succeed.

Yet, having such supporters and their undying pledge of allegiance to the king has an obvious pitfall. There will come a reckoning, one day, which will cause some of his minions to disagree with him. Already he and Musk are at odds with contrasting points of view about the government. History has repeatedly demonstrated all monarchies may have their day in the sun, but inevitably fail. And when, hopefully, this presidency comes tumbling down because of revenge and retribution, there will be no one left in his government to pick up these pieces based on hate. Hopefully, we can start over, perhaps in two years, when people realize the emperor is naked and was indeed so the day he first walked down the golden stairs of Trump tower.

The Free Press

 "You may be going to jail," my husband said the other day after reading my latest blog.

"You think???" I said, laughing.

"Of course, since you are admonishing the man who would be king/dictator."

I laughed again, knowing my blogs, soon to be posted on substack, are small potatoes. However, the non-laughing matter is he will surely go after the big presses. Freedom of the press may be a thing of the past. It was bad during the first term, but this term will be arguably worse. In his first term he went after CNN because of its coverage about him, and apparently tried to push The Department of Justice to block AT& T's acquisition of the Network's owner at the time, Time Warner. He has frequently ranted and rallied against the press, calling them "the enemy of the people." Since he is a media creation, this feels ridiculously ironic; they have given him too large a platform, freqently pushing his lies as facts.They have normalized an insanely abnormal man, a terrific injustice to the American public who believe him.

This second term will be worse. According to a piece in THE NEW YORKER, "there is a fear he will ramp up the deployment of subpoenas, specious lawsuits, court orders and search warrants to seize reporters' notes, devices and source materials." The threats are so large that THE WASHINGTON POST and THE L.A. TIMES refused to endorse Kamala, their candidate of choice. Joe and Mika went down to Mar-a-Lago to try to reconcile with him. Afterwards, he made fun of them for trying to get back in his favor. It is a terrible move to try to gain favor with a man who is so unhinged, so newspapers and media, beware of your kow-towing. Stop bowing down to him; it won't work!

Indeed, retribution is in the air. Trump has already opposed a bi-partisan federal bill that would allow journalists to withold the identity of confidential sources. "Republicans must kill this bill," he has said. Already Kash Patel, a Q conspiracy theorist and potential F.B.I director, has said, "We are going after American citizens who helped Joe Biden rig presidential elections," while on Steve Bannon's podcast. Trump's lawyers have already threatened or taken legal action against THE TIMES, THE WASHINGTON POST, ABC, Penguin Random House, and others. With one of the authors of 2025 (the 900 page document Trump knew nothing about), Brendan Carr, who is ideologically aligned with Elon Musk, to head the Federal Communications Commission, freedom of press may soon be obsolete.  Indeed, the Heritage Foundation's Project 2025 proposed ending federal funding for both NPR and PBS.

We are now like Putin's Russia. Another irony is just the other day, Russian television mocked America's chaos and disarray, clearly happy to have Trump and his chaos in office. It will only make Russia stronger as American power weakens. This is, after all, "the arsenal of a would-be-autocrat who seeks to intimidate his critics, protect himself from scrutiny and go on wearing away at the liberal democratic order." He desires the silence of the opposition, which is why it is critical for people to raise their voices of dissent high over the rooftops of every building, all over the world! And so I will.

*Acnowledgment is given to "The Talk of the Town," NEW YORKER, December 9th

Disqualified

 If one were doing a search for the president of a university, a hospital or a law firm, they would scrutinize a multitude of resumes. Unfortunately, little was done when the Republican candidate was chosen.  This one man, in particular, has a HUGE fan base who would go to bat for this man, which includes, perhaps, a call to arms. His base loves him so much they will fight, destroy the U.S. capital (if need be), but they will get their man in. They will lie, but so will he; he lies so much, it is a challenge to decipher truth from disinformation. It doesn't matter; he is loud and entertaining and a classic bully. He is certainly not a role model for workers, teachers, doctors, lawyers or students. My God, parents would punish their children for doing far less. His behavior is unacceptable. Plus, he has 34 felony convictions. There would have been more charges, many more, but he has relied on massive delaying tactics. He lies to those interviewing him, but they like a strong man, a powerful man; they don't mind his derision. In the "real" world, he would never be hired. He wouldn't even get a second interview. But it is this man who was selected to be president of the United States; you can't make this level of debasement up. It is parody at its worst. No one reads the news anyway or is truly that informed, so there are zero guardrails to reign him in. He is on a mission to destroy, and indeed he will.

The plot thickens. Now this man is in charge of putting together a charlatan cabinet and staff, and he does it with speed and with one goal and one goal only: loyalty to the chief. It is like a hospital hiring the worst doctors and staff and nurses because they will honor this "fearless leader," and do whatever he wants, even if this means seeing patients die right before their very eyes. This is retribution against your enemy time; not a government. Let's start with Pete Hegseth's nomination as defense secretary. Even his own mother wrote to him in 2018 saying he was an abuser of women and a misogynist. No surprise. He is also an alcoholic, with several ugly scenes to his credit. In addition to no expereince, he wants to ban women from combat operations. Seriously? But he loves Donald Trump, so what else matters? Joining him in the list of challenges is Putin-lover Tulsi Gabbard for Director of National Intelligence, sure to make foreign nations keep many secrets from our country. She is putting our national security at risk. Foreign leaders are already banning together to ban America from sensitive information. Who could blame them? R.F.K. Jr our possibly soon to be our secretary of Health and Human Services, is the man in part responsible for discouraging vaccines in Somoa, which resulted in an outbreak of 5,700 cases of measles and more than eighty deaths (many of them children) as a consequence. Personality doctor Dr. Oz, who lost his gubernatorial race in Pennsylvania, has now been chosen to head the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services. Between one bogus scientist and one non-scientist, what more could you ask for! 

Yet, there is still more. Kash Patel, whose only goal is to take care of the Don, wants to trash the F.B.I., a task he will have no problem with. He is an election denier consipracy-theory junkie, who has bounced from job to job with a level of gross inefficiency, in truth on par with everyone else. His goal is retribution. Let's not forget Kristi Noem the current Govenor of South Dakota who is well-known for two things: shooting her own dog who was a nuisance, as well as a goat, and dancing for thirty minutes at a rally with the Don, because he forgot he was supposed to speak and not dance. She is now pegged to be Director of Homeland Security, who better to serve in such a role.

Other cast members include seven people who worked on the 2025 Project, the distastrous more than 900-page document that seeks to destroy all our norms, all our institutions and all the progress we have made as a nation in the past decades. I shudder at this "shadow" government, that selects Massad Boulas (his credential: daughter Tiffany's father-in-law) as advisor to the Middle East and Charles Kushner (Jared's father) a recently pardoned criminal as ambassador to France.

I am so glad Joe Biden pardoned his son Hunter, and to say otherwise, as an appalled Republican or citizen, indicates how much you have swallowed the Kool-Aid; hypocrisy is now your middle name. What Hunter did to break the law is NOTHING compared to this lowly group of sycophants who DARE to lead our government. This is not the Twilight Zone; it is not a dystopian novel; it is not even a successful parody. It is that bad! I would laugh-out-loud if I weren't crying and mourning whatever this country wants to call itself, not anything that bears any semblance to reality. Each day's selection is a new disaster.

What Will Doctors and Women Do?????

 Two years ago, after Roe vs. Wade was overturned, my husband, a retired physician was asked by a family member to prescribe abortion pills for a young pregnant woman who lived in Ohio, and was past the six week abortion mandate adopted by many states. As a New Yorker and a very humane doctor, his immediate response was, "Of course." However, he needed some questions answered: 1. Was it an ectopic pregnancy? 2. Would someone care for this woman afterwards and finally, what COULD happen to him if the state discovered he had written the prescription. The response? "Jail time, a fine and a possible loss of his license." He offered an alternative: The woman could come to New York (he would cover the cost); he would find her a clinic and she could stay with us in New York. Apparently, someone had offered the same option in Pennsylvania, so the girl was helped and saved.

What will happen as more sates fail to approve this insane six-week aboortion ban, and physicians and health-care providers are forced to turn women away who are having a severe medical crisis from the fetus they are carrying? Just yesterday in Georgia a woman died since no one would treat her bleeding from a miscarriage; this is now commonplace. It is also a gross miscarriage of decency which compels health-care providers to turn their backs on women in distress.What will happen in 2025, when this new adminstration, not to be trusted, perhaps decides to enact a federal ban? 

Immediately, more women may potetially die; others will lose the opportunity to ever have children again and some women will select to have children they can not care for. I just finished a terrifying article in THE NEW YORKER: "The Texas Exodus." Many decent ob-gyn physicians are leaving the state, because they are no longer thought of as health-care providers, but as criminals if they help a woman who seeks to have an abortion, even when medically justified. "From a medical standpoint, the treatment for aboriton and miscarriage is the same--and so, even though miscarriage care remained legal, physicians began putting it off or denying it outright." According to the author of the article, Stephania Taladrid, "After Roe was overturned, the laws in Texas were tightened further, so that abortion was banned at any stage of pregnancy, unless a woman was threatened with death or substantial impairment of a major bodily function. Violations could send practioners to prison for life."

Texas is not the only state where ob-gyn doctors are leaving. Any state that has criminalized the care of women's reproductive health has propelled a mass-exodus of its medical establishment, and now this is SO MANY states across the country. Not only that, according to the article, medical schools are discouraging students from going into these fields. Where, after all, can they safely practise medicine according to the Hippocratic Oath they sought to preserve. How many states will survive this political execution??

I find myself filled with grief and fury on so many levels. First of all, I am enraged with the many MEN who made these laws, and the indecency of the dysfunctional SUPREME COURT that over-turned the law of the land. WHAT WOMAN  COULD SIGN ON FOR THIS AT THE BALLOT BOX????? I am angry at all the governments--state and otherwise, who have AGREED that this is acceptable. Are ANY of these men, these people, prepared to take care of all the unwanted children being born, particularly since 2025 is poised to CUT many of the needed social services for improverished children. I am angry at a country that saw the clock turning backwards and still elected this man to be president. And I feel, with a heavy-heart, what it must be like to be a woman who is impotent when her body betrays her, and there is no one around to offer medical or emotional support. I feel for the doctors who have trained for years, those who only wanted to help, and now who could be faced with possible criminal conviction. The moral compass of this country is GONE, and I, too, am impotent as I watch our world slowly slip away. It is not a world I signed on for either!

New York

  "How could we live here?" 

  This question resonates inside me daily.  New York is not, after all, the easiest place to live. It is not always clean. It is way too crowded, especially in the theater district, and I love the theater. There can truly be wall to wall traffic. It is also at times dirty. The garbage, though picked up, sometimes still lingers on the streets, an ugly reminder you are a New Yorker, since you have learned to live with it.

And yet, and yet....I can't imagine living anywhere else for any prolonged period of time. I love its energy, even though it is hyper energy, it suits me. I love that there is so much to do here. Today I took the train to Canal Street and went to a very incredible museum, The Banksy Museum. I have discovered with TDF and groupon how to do things inexpensively. And yes, New York is terribly over-priced: the rents, the food, the amenities.

Everywhere I go, including in my building, there is a vast array of faces, religions, ethnicities, genders, ages. My own building feels like a model U.N. I love this, but even more so, I feel safe here, that the liberties of freedom of choice, a woman's right to reproductive care, the safeguarding of my DACA students, the books I read, the bible which will not appear in my public schools, my libraries which will be stocked with every book; in other words--at least for now--I feel like living in New York is living in a state where one's freedom is not inhibited, one not granted in so many states across America. I can only pray the federal government does not change this, but for now, my ob-gyn does not have to think about leaving her city and state to practice safe medicine. My local librarian can stock the shelves with any book he or she chooses. New York has many things which do not work, but its city and state municipalities do not adhere to any draconian rules.

And so, New York is my imperfect home. And as they say, there is no place like home!

And here is my love letter to New York

Overgrown Garden: A Love Letter to New York

Dear New York,

I should have left you

when it was easy

could have traipsed

into a spring of sunshine and sparrows

where miles of clean beaches

beautiful sunsets

and the stores

you might take me to

shelved with caviar, Perrier

simple breath

home baked bread

radiant of light and bright

a costume of white,

still

I allowed you

under my skin--

sweat of summer sidewalks

too much garbage

lingering like an open mouth

spewing a restless mass.

You were gritty

and dirty

feverish

without any relief,

at the corner bodega

you bought me a Slushy

and the voices

of language--

English, Spanish, Arabic, Bengali, Hindi--

a meandering queue

of faces and places

made me dizzy

with desire.

New York

youe frantic air is sifling

yet you pull me into this frenzy

of taste and smell and color;

how could I ever leave you?

Evn the daffodil

loves to linger

in your overgrown garden.

Travel

When I was younger, I imagined traveing the world. I waited until I was an older teen to travel, when I could truly appreciate the wonders and magic of new places, and also when I had the money. I thought of myself as "somehwhat" of an adventurer, traveling with a backpack to England, Scotland, Italy. There were many more mysteries just beyond the horizon.

Indeed, I traveled to many other places-other European cities; other American cities; Mexico; Canada;  Vietnam; the Philippines; Iceland; Caribbean Islands. I always went with an open heart and wide-open eyes. I was never disappointed. I imagined retirement as a time when I could travel far and wide. 

Yet, here I am, and the world has grown smaller. Places such as Russia, Poland, China now seem off limits.It feels like there is more time, but less desire to travel extensively. I am more tired and I like staying home. Air travel is more fraught.

It doesn't mean I am done. I still have a bucket list of Europen cities as well as Australia, Africa, Japan. How will I fare with a twenty plus hour plane ride? I am not sure. The magic and mystery of foreign soil still beckons, but the body (and mind) are fatigued. So, too, do I feel that way with American cities whose politics I abhor. Do I want to give my tourist money to those cities? My husband says no, but for me I am not certain.

There is much uncertainty as I travel in the future. All I can say is onward and upward. To where I am not sure.

The Sorrows and Joys of Getting Older

     "What is good about getting older?" a beloved family member asked at Thanksgiving.

        "I could say, NOT MUCH, since there are so many things, not good, but there are some rewards in turning seventy and retiring.

        "What are they?" She was clearly puzzled. I, too, was puzzled by my response, since I have been feeling somewhat down since the election, thinking this political landscape is NOT the life I wanted to have during my twilight years. My moral compass has only grown stronger with age, so 2025 America is a far cry from a decent world I take pride in. I find the cabinet choices alone to be reprehensible. My God, even Pete Hegseth's mother wrote a piece published in the TIMES in 2018, where she accused her son of mistreating women for years. She said, "he was an abuser of women." In my world he could not hold ANY position in any capacity. Yet, my guess is many members of Congress will not care, so I will have to simply sit on my sorrow.

The sorrow goes deeper. My body can not do what it used to do in so many ways. Head-stands are out in yoga, but so much else is out too, including very active aerobics. I don't swim as many miles as I used to, since I can't. I used to never take public transportation, since I walked everywhere. Now I often take the bus or the subway. My knee and my hip hurt. Plus, even as I am writing this, it is Saturday afternoon, and I feel really tired. I slept well last night, which is often NOT the case for me now as a senior. Adding insult to injury, I am now totally gray-haired, by choice, so when people look at me they see an older woman. I am!

But here is the good part, too. I accept my limitations like I never did before. I push myself, but not too hard, and that is a good thing. I have gotten off the treadmill and I no longer want to get back on it. I appreciate the leisure of a planless day like I never did before. I still exercise, I still write and read, enjoy culture and am inspired to take political action, but I do so at my own pace, no one else's. I don't want to be anyone else but myself, and though my life is not perfect, I am free to be me. That same freedom means I will call you out if you disrespect me, if I don't appreciate what you are doing or saying. There is no one I am afraid of, no one I will kow-tow to. If you don't like me as a result, that is okay, too. Not everyone appreciates this style, and that is fine, which does not mean I won't make sacrifices, especially with my immediate family, particularly my grandchildren, since it takes a village and I want to be part of that village. I have learned to keep quiet and when to use my voice. Plus, at this point in my life, I need not be friends with people I feel little in common with, though I never mind challenges or differences. I am not going to be connected, ever again, out of obligation, since what I really value now is authenticity, even if your authentic is not mine.

I would like to grow old with peace and serentiy, and sometimes that will not be possible, since friction and tumult and the unexpected are always on the horizon, like this past election, which I did not prepare psychologically for in any way.  And there are health issues, too. So, as I grow older with my wrinkled face and gray hair and flab on my stomach, I have to be cognizant--even more so--of the little control I have to map the future. I will do, what I can, to make it the best possible one, and try to ride the waves of sorrow that sometimes might make their way onto my map. But the map will always be mine, so I am prepared for the sorrow and jubilation of the journey.

        

Levi

 He is new to our world, little Levi Nat, and he had his first Thanksgiving, 2024, with aplomb!

Levi, four months old, gets his own poem.

Levi

Little Levi-

lovely

smiles sunshine

kicks legs and hands

in joyful celebration;

he is 

a baby blessed

in blankets of love,

may he grow

into the world

with bountiful beauty

that he will make

even

if it isn't there.

He and his cousins, Ella and Jake, are our future!

The Composition, for Ella's Tenth Birthday!

 Ella is a force of fury-psssionate, loving, kind. I have watched her since she was a little baby, so I have watched her grow. And so, I celebrate the joy of knowing such a special little girl with this ghazal:

The Composition, For Ella, Age Ten

Ella plays the violin

music in the wind

laughter plucks the strings of joy

music in the wind

sometimes sorrow sings a dirge

music cries the wind

the notes don't know where to go

music cries the wind

but then a smile, the highest scale

music blasts the wind

laughter louder than a whale

music fast in wind

the happiest of compositions

her music makes the wind.

Trick or treat, but she is always a treat!

Jake and Ira, a poem

 You already saw the picture of Ira, "pop-pop" Reiser. He and Jake have a very special relationship. Here is a poem for these two guys:

                                            American Dream Amusement Park

The ferris wheel

never stops circling

when Ira and Jake

sit inside;

like another planet

whirling up and down

around the sunl

these two boys:

seven and seventy

Jake and Ira

live in the orbit

of love and laughter

in a galaxy

uniquely

their own.

Ira

 He is my my friend, my husband, the wonderful father to my children. We have been married for forty-six years, and I have grown to admire him more each day, as I come to deeply understand his kindness and compassion. My joke is he should be made the director of Health and Human Services in the new adminstration because he would consistently help and never harm people. The joke is he would never be asked, nor would he ever work for such a corrupt adminstration. He has an extraordinarily strong moral compass and integrity.

     HERE IS MY POEM FOR IRA: View from the Bridge, Eastside Manhattan, 36th Floor

The bridge

of kindness

you've built

with patients

even when there's no money

to pay you;

the water

too cold to swim in

(you never swim in cold water)

but in June

you plunged

in the pool

since your six-year old grandson

was waiting

for his Pop-pop;

Pop-pop

one of the words Jake speaks

said loud and clear

as does nine year old Ella.

Pop-pop

a prayer

a psalm

to the small building

surrounded by many toweing ones--

the man

you may notice,

but brick by brick

tile by tile

has given us a fortress

(we, his family),

so the bridge may fall

the river may flood

fears may ferment

from a world

we never expected to turn so ugly,

but Ira

is there

and nothing else matters

                                                

Giving Out Food

 Today Ira and I volunteered at a soup kitchen for the breakfast shift 6-7:30. Usually there are, perhaps, 120 people, but today, thanksgiving week, there were one hundred and eighty-nine people. I had to over-step a psychological hurdle looking at the line. When political rhetoric established the duality of "them" and "us", I invite those politicians to join any line where food is being distributed and obseve how many people looked like me and Ira, but because of food scarcity, must get meals elsewhere. It made me weep inside, since I shudder to imagine what will happen in 2025 when the new adminstration takes over and Musk and Ramaswamy execute their plan to cut, cut, cut. There is already talk of cuts to many social networks, including CHIPS, medicaid and medicare. My friend said school lunches might be cut. What will children do who can't get fed? Feeding the stomach helps to feed the mind; the mind can't function without the necessary sustenance.

For today, my only focus is on tzedukah. My friend said the only way to transcend this "brave new world" is to do good where you can, with a few pet causes. Indeed, this will be one of mine with Ira by my side.We will feed the poor, the hungry, those people who fell off the grid--if only for a short while."The highest form of wisdom is kindness," according to the Talmud,

I invite you to be as kind as you can be, and as smart, and with compassion in your heart recognize without migrants to farm the land and without social services, that the streets will be flooded with physical and psychological hunger. When you give thanks this thanksgiving, feel free to be blessed with what you have, but remember, even those who worked hard and came here for the sake of their children, as your families once did, that there are too many people walking around who will have to snake around in long lines for the possibility of one meal to sustain them. Please bless them, too!

Happy Thanksgiving

To one and all! This is the time to count my blessings, which is what I will do. I say this during what is a challenging time, since as a senior blogger, this is not the world I imagined, seen through the lens of HIS vision of darkness, and those people and institutions he and his team have decided are irrelevant. They are relevant to me, so I am blessed to be a woman with strong convictions, married to a man who has equally strong convictions. We are both figuring out how to negotiate this landscape, and what we will do.

I am lucky to have friends and family, like-minded people, who understand this quagmire, so I need not explain why I am feeling the joy of the season, but some sorrow, too. They feel it. As my friends have said, "One can't live in a bubble."

I am glad and feel blessed to know I am not alone in wanting a better world, where health, safety, education, compassion, empathy and humanity are paramount. I am appreciative that we--my friends-- share so many values, and are honest and authentic in the way we appraoch the world. We strongly believe in separation of Church and State. We don't believe that lying and hyperbole is any way to run a country.  Another friend said, "You can't change the ugly choices that this adminstration has made, but you can work on one or two pet causes, and do whatever you can do." I will and will do so with my husband by my side.

I revel in my children and grandchildren, their choices in partners, the children they are raising, the times we celebrate together. Thus, I celebrate today with Amanda's folks and the delcious food I know Amanda and Craig will prepare, and when we fill out our piece of paper, "What are you thankful for?" my answer will be "For all of this! For all of you!" This includes the ability to try to make what is not good better.

My Three Munchkins

No, they are not munchkins, but they are out of this world special, each in his or her own way. They are my remarkable grandchildren.

Ella is number one, as in the first one born, and now, the only girl. Each time she sees me, she runs into my arms as if she has not seen me in years. She is wildly passionate, creative, warm and funny. Sometimes she seems wise beyond her years, and other times she is just a young girl. She always makes me laugh, in her stories and the way she looks at the world. She loves gymnastics and can spiral into a move in the middle of a conversation. She loves her beauty creams, but also reminds me, "to take care of saving an animal from extinction" when it is time to celebrate her birthday. She fills me with joy.

Jake, too, fills me with joy as the number two grandchild, and the first grandson. Though he is non-verbal, he has his own ways of communicating--wth his hands, his eyes, his board and his body. He, too, is funny, and makes me laugh because he has a terrific sense of humor. He loves when I read to him, and can listen to ten books at a time--too many for me, at times. He loves music and loves to dance to music, and is good at it. He has a special relationship with his "pop-pop," what he calls Ira. Jake is fearless, and when he goes on the rides with Ira, I feel like I am star-gazing at an extraordinary relationship.

Then there is little Levi, Samantha and Josh's four-month-old, the newest member of our tribe. He gazes at the world with wide-open eyes. When he is on his back, he kicks his legs in delight. Though he is so little, he, too, seems to love books and music and engaging with people. The word which comes to mind is delicous. I am eager to see what he will become.

I am blessed to have all three in my life. When I feel the darkness of these times fill my brain, I try to replace the negativity with the positivity of their special smiles, and I am reminded of all that is good, and why I should work extra hard to make this world one I would like to see them grow up in.

My Children

This blog is intended to record what is sorrowful, but also what is sweet, and in this landscape I must talk about my grown children. They are really quite remarkable, sometimes sweet, sometimes not, but always people I admire.

I begin with Craig, my eldest, almost forty. I love standing at the sidelines and watching how he is with his wife and children; in particular, in those moments he thinks I am not looking. I love the way he hugs and kisses spontaneously. Though he rarely calls (he is not a phone person), when he does call it is often to talk--and really talk. When I get glimpses into his open heart, I marvel at what's inside. Most importantly, he is such a hard worker, and provides diligently for his family. I am proud of him at work. The best part is the partner he has selected. We love Amanda as our own, and she is such a terrific yin to his yang. She is an amazing Mama, a terrific person, and she grounds him in remarkable ways.

And now to our Samantha, a new mother, a marvel. She, too, is a hard worker, and loving to a fault to those she loves. She is a passionate do-gooder, and this translates into a job where she is helping those in need. She has easy access to her feelings, and this is the way she consistently relates to those around her. She loves her family-- all of us--the way Craig does, too. Josh, her husband, is also a wonderful partner; they complement one another. They are both wonderful parents.

My children have been launched in positive ways, so they really don't need me that much--which is great. But, if Ira or I needed them, they would be there with open arms, as would their partners. And that is as good as it gets!

A Divided America

 Clearly, this country is so divided that East is East and West is West and never the twain shall meet. I am quite certain if politics were left out of the conversation, we could chat amicably about our lives and the things we love. My husband plays cards in an atomosphere where half of the people voted one way, and the other half another way. The night is just about the card game, nothing more, and they can kibbutz and have fun. However, this division sometimes comes into play-rarely, only when someone dares to bring up a wild conspiracy theory that the 2020 election was stolen and the response is, "No it was not." Then everything stops.

This is what I know about the other side. Some voted because they like disruption; they don't want conventional political leaders. It does not matter that he has selected cabinet officers with little to no experience; hence, they don't trust government, and some of this is true. They also say that prices have gone up--they have, not realizing in recent months not only have prices gone down, but the economy is doing way better in terms of jobs filled, gas prices lowered and a stock market boom. But they don't watch the same news that I do. They watch Fox, deemed, worldwide, entertainment, not news; plus, they have been sued millions for all the alternate facts they have created. Alternate facts don't bother the other side, so they tune into social media to get their news. Elon Musk invested millions to feed the Trump campaign and did so strategically; feeding the two sides of the Israeli conflict different information, so each side would feel placated. He fed into the image of a "Woke" other side, depite the fact that Kamala's campaign did not dwell on some of these issues. This created an empire who felt the fabric of their communities was being destroyed--the books their children read; gender idenity; immigrants who were all taking over their jobs, forgetting we are all immigrants. Women (53 per cent of White women) fell into the trap,"Women, I will protect you." It did not matter that his running mate was so clueless as to suggest all grandma(s) could care for their grandchildren; women without children were "childless cat ladies." It did not matter that Trump is an alleged serial sex offender. It did not matter that he insulted women based on their looks. It did not matter that he said Hatian immigrants were "eating the dogs and cats." Nothing mattered but the macho and bluster he presented, but people liked the performance. It worked. He won over people in this election. It became a them and us in their world view.

There was no them and us on the other side. We are all a nation of immigrants, human beings, and ones who want to work across the political divide. The other side read newspapers and followed stations such as CNN, which reported news, which meant mostly facts. This side created a campaign that we are all Americans and we need to curb our guns, we need to aim for truth, we need to believe in science, people who stormed the capital were not patriots, women need to have their reproductive rights, health and safety need to be safeguarded, children need CHIPS and school lunches to eat, and you can't do away with a DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION because if each state does what it wants, all that red in the middle will be using the bible as a text, won't use texts that have even an iota of FACTS in them, will ban books in the classroom, won't allow the very diverse voices of America, including religious freedom (no, we are not just White, Christian Americans), won't allow marriages of Gay people, nor will it allow them to adopt the surplus of babies now that abortion will mostly be illegal. Also, social security and medicare are not entitlements; I paid into them my whole life. "We are not going backwards," was the mantra of the campaign on this political side.

But indeed we are going backwards; pity the children and grandchildren of the next generation, one where the military is coming to take migrant children away from their parents, even those who have lived here their whole life. They voted in a man without morals, scruples or character, and if they are poor and suffering, if they are women,  if their health insurance is taken away, he has nothing on his agenda that will help them. This divide will grow and like Jesus said, "forgive them father, for they know not what they have done." If the humanity and decency gap grows larger, which it already has during this campaign, I am not so sure I will forgive them; it might be too hard. He consistently showed what he was about--a charlatan, at best--and more. And they voted for him anyway.